Thursday, July 29, 2010

The Importance of Date Night

Everywhere we turn we hear about the importance of date night. Pastors and relationship gurus spout this knowledge all the time. I appreciate the sentiment however, what do you do if it is not something you can do on a regular basis due to cash flow? Sure, have the date at home and watch a movie, pop some popcorn..blah, blah, blah. Take a walk or go on a picnic in your neighborhood (in 93 degree heat and 100 percent humidity) or just go have coffee (we don't drink coffee) and talk. All are valid ideas and fun but we still have to find a babysitter.

We have friends that we trade with every once in awhile but everyone is busy. Everyone has demands that take up time. I mean, we hardly have time to spend with each other much less our friends and then to just hand off our kiddos is not easy.
Yes I can hire a babysitter. What is the going rate these days anyway? We try to pay $6 or $7 dollars an hour but I know many people pay at least $10. So, to go on a (nice) date with my husband for one evening here are a few scenarios:
Dinner: $30, Movies: $20 (no popcorn or snacks), babysitter: at the high rate $50.
Dinner: $45 (Amerigo), Concert at the arena: $60-$120, Babysitter: $50-$70 (or in our case the last time a t-shirt, $35) and another $20
Dinner: Cheap $20 (think Chickfila), Dance Lesson at the Wildhorse (I think those are free right?), Babysitter $50.
So a date for us with a babysitter (that we probably don't know all that well) is around $70-$150. It is no wonder we don't go out all that often.

Hmm, now that I think about it our families should move out here so we can let the kids hang out with the grandparents. :)

7 comments:

Susan said...

I so understand Karen. Jim went to Mens Fraternity the last two years and the pastor keeps preaching on that which I agree date night is definitely needed but it is tough to do when you don't have grandparents or any family members close. We swap out with friends some too. But to go on a date night every week- we'd have to take out a loan! :)and factoring the babysitter in with your plans makes for an expensive date even when what you and your hubby do is cheap.

sarahe said...

wow--that is tough! we don't have kids so the biggest issue is not a factor for us, but some fun & super cheap things that we like to do are go to Barnes & Noble and split a dessert...hope you can find something! maybe your church could organize kids nights or something with childcare? i would think if your pastor's are talking about it so much, they should look for ways to help!

Sarah said...

Karen I understand completely...try adding 2 more kids to the mix. :) I will say though that I have a couple of names I can pass along of girls that I truly trust and are not too expensive...actually I think they are really flexible with budgets. And just because you have family close doesn't mean you get to go out all the time. We ahve family 2 minutes from us and still 99% of the time (which is really about 3-4 times a year) have to pay a babysitter. :(

Band of Brothers said...

we don't go out on dates very much either, due to similar reasons. Finding a sitter I trust with 4 little children is hard for me mentally. However, thankfully inlaws up the street offer to watch the kids almost every week.

SO tonight we are going to starbucks because I am craving a frappachino or iced coffee. I am so excited.

If I were you, I would go out for a NICE dessert somewhere with air conditioning. And when the weather is nice, pack up one of your amazing desserts and eat it somewhere outdoors. It would not cost so much, and you would only be gone an hour so you could save money on a sitter!

Debbie said...

Grandma would love to be there to take care of the kids, but unfortunatly grandma is still working for a living. How bout moving back to Vacaville?

Karen said...

Thanks ladies,
I was just having a pity party. We do have good friends to swap with but schedules are crazy. :) Dessert with air conditioning sounds good about now. :)

♥ recipe addict said...

I feel your pain. Luckily our kids are all teens now so we don't have the added expense of paying a babysitter... but for sympathy sake, our car insurance has more than doubled since 3 of the teens are licensed drivers now... does that make us equal? LOL We can't afford a date night even without the cost of a sitter. :(